Hot Garbage

Well, football fans, it’s been awhile. Forgive my trespasses, but this work thing is really getting in the way of my commenting about sports. We need to go all the way back to Iowa State to catch up.

The ‘Horns can’t seem to play a complete game. Either the defense kills it and the offense stinks up the joint, or vice versa. Against the Cyclones, the Texas offense really put up a decent fight. It was the defense that left everyone shaking their head. What happened? True, the Cyclones are better than their record shows but the Texas defense on paper was a better team than Iowa State’s offense. It’s Inexplicable that the Cyclones kept it close and came within a possession of winning the game.

That brings us to the hot garbage that was the Kansas State game. Manhattan, Kansas is made of whatever passes as Longhorn kryptonite. Texas cannot seem to win there. So, the ‘Horns suffered their first shutout since 2004. The Texas offense was, well, offensive. Our young but promising QB made many, many mental errors. It’s all part of the process, but at some point the balance tips and we should see slow but steady progress without these occasional setbacks. The current offense is more Jekyll and Hyde. It’s difficult to know which squad will step onto the field. The offense will improve–we have to be patient and endure these horrible growing pains. However, it’s just brutal. The Hot Garbage offense needs to end.

The defense had a good showing against K State. There were some blown opportunities on crucial third downs that put the game out of reach, especially considering the poor offensive performance from Texas. I mean, come on. It doesn’t take much to beat ZERO POINTS.

It’s difficult to predict how things may play out for the remainder of the season for Texas. Many believe the toughest contests are behind them, save for TCU. That could be another bloodletting—or not. Depending on who shows up. But that’s a concern for another day.

This weekend, Texas travels to the Land of the Dip Cup. Let’s Hope the players got all their inoculations. There’s Nothing worse than going to Lubbock, other than coming back with lockjaw and night vision.

Texas and Tech both come to the contest with 3-5 records. I had to pause after typing that and take one of my nerve pills. Tech got hammered last weekend by TCU to the tune of 82-27. EIGHTY-TWO POINTS. That’s a basketball score, folks. While I don’t think Swoopes & Co. can lay on that kind of scoring, they should be able to put some points on the board. Please, football gods, let it be so.

Keys for the offense:

  • Swoopes has to be a leader. He has to bring energy and excitement, no matter what. No coming out flat in Jones Stadium, amid the flying debris from the classy Red Raiders fan base.
  • RUN THE BALL. The Red Raiders’ defense is among the worst in Division 1. Punish them for it.
  • Most importantly, rebound from the K State loss. Yes, it hurt. Yes, it was a bunch of garbage football assaulting our collective eyeballs. Let it go. Live to fight another day.
  • Keep in mind the Tech defense gave up 785 yards to TCU. SEVEN HUNDRED AND EIGHTY-FIVE. I would be super pleased with half that amount of production on Saturday.

Keys for the defense:

  • Malcom Brown.
  • Contain DeAndre Washington. He is the Big 12’s leading rusher with 699 yards. He needs to be introduced to the turf, and develop an intimate relationship with it.
  • Contain QB Webb, who has the potential to be an effective weapon. Blitz early and often. Pressure, pressure, pressure this guy.

Kliff Kingsbury, the poor man’s Ryan Gosling, was gracious in his comments about Texas, and praised their improvement. He showed an appropriate amount of concern, honestly. If both offense and defense function at the same time on Saturday, it could be a long day for the Dip Cup Brigade in L-Town.

Let’s be honest here. Aside from winning the Red River Whatever-It-Is, a victory in Lubbock is absolutely the BEST THING EVER. The ‘Horns are predicted to win by 10 points or so, depending on whose Magic 8 Ball did the talking. After that shellacking in Manhattan (not the good one), I believe the ‘Horns coaches put the whip to these boys. Figuratively, of course. Saturday should see some improvements, most likely on offense. Seriously, the Red Raiders rank toward to bottom of the FBS teams. Don’t get too excited—so does Texas. The question becomes who can suck LESS on Saturday.

My money is on the ‘Horns.

Game time is 7:30 p.m. Eastern. Get your burnt orange rear into a seat if you’re anywhere close to Lubbock (goodness knows there’s no other reason to be there). Scream, chant, be present and support these boys. People with eyeballs can see the game on Fox Sports 1, so my prayers and sacrifices of Matt Leinart action figures worked. At this point, Texas is playing for a bowl game. Sorry Swoopes, but the playoffs are a pipe dream at this point. You know the chant…NEXT YEAR! NEXT YEAR! NEXT YEAR!

Hook ‘em!

Follow me on Twitter at: TXgridirongirl

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